He's Just not that into you..

When you like a guy, you get excited. I'm talking the giddy, shaky, holy cow bells I'm going to throw up, excitement when he asks you out on that first date. He swings by in this hot car, opens your door, and wisks you off to a fancy dinner filled with pastas and steak and wine. He takes you home, plants a kiss on your lips and says he will call you later. ...but he doesn't call you later. Like what did you do? You didn't find broccoli in your teeth in the bathroom. You didn't slip on the entrance rug. You didn't scream holy terror when the waiter knocked over your sweet tea. You even offered to pay for your own meal! Miss I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T. Clearly, he doesn't know what that means. It was literally so perfect that you think this kid just must have fainted off into a deep coma while driving and landed up in the middle of some pond and you need to start calling all local hospitals to make sure he's still alive. Because this was just so perfect that there's no way in hell this guy isn't calling. Turns out, there's a 1 out of 9,482,323,235.07 chance that he really did faint and is shacked up in some hospital bed. But odds are... that didn't happen. Odds are he was faking it. I know he acted perfect and I know you're left replaying the entire night, retracing your words and analyzing his every sentence - even going as far as breaking down the structure searching for some answer, some clue to help you with this madness. But stop. He doesn't want to hurt your feelings. Unless you're just a complete prick, no guy walks around stomping on hearts of women for fun. Actually, I know a few. But that's a whooooole other ball game. He didn't call because he didn't want to. His phone still works. It's not floating in the bottom of some pond. He didn't go over his texting limit or his monthly mobile-to-mobile minutes. He didn't all of a sudden turn gay and you are totally, like ew, to him now. He got your text message two days later - "Hey you. I had a lot of fun the other night. Got any plans this weekend?" And he also got that missed call and voicemail you left too. "Heeeeeeey there, just never heard back from you! You missed a great party this past weekend. I won in beer pong. That never happens - you would be so proud, you......" Sorry, but he hit delete a looooong time before that. You don't need to double text him or call again - you will look psycho. Nobody likes a psycho. When it boils down to it, he just wasn't feeling it. If he likes you, he will call. If he likes you, you'll get a text back. Or {shocker!} you'll get a text first. Remember all those guys who went text-less back from you? Remember those hearts that were lost in you, but you just didn't give a shit? OH HEY karma. The guy you actually did like doesn't like you at all. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. You could be the biggest, juiciest, ripest, most peachy peach there is and there will still be someone in the world that just doesn't like peaches. If a man wants you, nothing will keep him away. If he doesn't, nothing will make him stay. If he can't get you off his mind, you'll be hearing from him. If you never were on his mind, he doesn't really wanna hear from you. He's onto the next one - Jay Z said so. And we all trust Jay Z. So stop turning your phone off in hopes of turning it back on and receiving a missed text. Stop leaving it at home while you do errands & thinking magically because you are away, he will text you. Stop wishing on stars and spend the money you're throwing in the wishing well on a cute outfit for your next date. Get out of that dirty pond looking for his cell phone remains and get on with your life. After all, you are smart, beautiful, worthy and you damn sure don't have a single moment to waste waiting on someone who wouldn't wait on you. Remember that. <3Amanda

The sweetness of mistakes.

We all make mistakes. We all need to assert our rights to make mistakes, and if people cannot accept our imperfections, then thats their fault.
I have learned that the greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearful that you are going to make another one.
Mistakes are a lesson of wisdom. The past cannot be changed, but my friend the future is still in your power! Learn from your mistakes, and be sure to work hard at never making the same mistake again!
I have learned recently that as hard as I try to be perfect for not only me, but my friends and family, is a lot more work and a lot harder than I thought. It's simply impossible, and it will never happen. If I had my life to live over again, I would DARE to make more mistakes. Mistakes obviously sh
show us what needs improving, and without them how would we know what we had to work on?
I am the person I am today because of all my mistakes and lessons I have learned from them. Do I regret any of them I made? Hmm..well I am definetley not happy with some of them thats for sure! But they have taught me right from wrong, and what to NOT do next time. So no, I do not regret them.
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. The only thing you can really do to fix mistake is learn from it, and to not do it again.
Life is all about experiences, and trial and error.
Life is a journey, not a destination.
DARE to make mistakes people.
Live and Learn. How many times have we heard that before? Plenty.
"Be not afraid of making a mistake, but ready to accept the lessons learned from it."


<3 much love
Amanda.
So take heed! And get out there.

You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.

Sometimes in life, you find a special friend. Someone who changes your life just by being a part of it. Someone who makes you laugh until you can't stop. Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world. Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it. This is forever friendship. When you're down and the world seems dark and empty, your forever friend lifts you up in spirit and makes that dark and empty world suddenly seem bright and full. Your forever friend gets you through the hard times, the sad times and the confused times. If you turn and walk away, your forever friend follows. If you lose your way, your forever friend guides you and cheers you on. Your forever friend holds your hand and tells you that everything is going to be okay. And if you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete because you need not worry. You have a forever friend, and forever has no end.

Friendship to me, is nothing to be taken lightly. Friendship is something to be cherished, to be loved, and to be taken care of. True friends dont come around very often, but when they do, hold on tight, and make sure to never let go. Friends are someone to laugh with, have fun with, someone to lean on, to cry to, and someone who will support you no matter what. Just like the seign says, a friend is someone who would bail you out of jail, but a true friend is the one sitting next to you saying, dam that was a good time, but boy did we mess up.

I admire those with a few close friends, and i pity the ones with just many aquaintances. I frown upon those who find joy in putting others down, and I praise those who live to bring people up. A true friend wont judge you, and a true friend defienelty wont turn their back on you when they dont agree with something you did. They will be there for you when it is convienent, and most importantly, when its NOT convienent. The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention, and a true friend always gives you 110% of their attention.

Friendship should be surrounded with ceremonies and respects, and not crushed into corners and belittled at all costs. In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. YES. Friends, no matter how bad the situation, will always stick up for you, always have your back, and wont back down at any costs. A friendship should not be defined by the differences between the two people,nor should it be determined and controlled by one person. A friend will always be behind you and support you, no matter how much they disagree with your choices or decisions.


No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow.

Think about this next time you find your "friends" betraying you, belittling you, or turning their back against you. Are they REALLY your friends?

It doesn't matter what those horrible people say. To me, you're ALWAYS a somebody.


much love and friendship,

<3 Amanda

Looking back. At the Past.

What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment. And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new. Right now.


Have you ever been asked, if you could go back to your past and change one thing, what would it be? I'm sure we all have, and honestly, i HATE that question. I've learned over the years that it doesn't matter what your past holds, and no one should ever judge you on what you have done in your past. What matters is NOW, TODAY, and who you are right now. As long as you are happy with who you are today and what you are doing, your past shouldnt matter, and it shouldnt keep you down or be a deal breaker for ANYTHING.

We cannot change our past. We can not change the fact that we acted in a certain way. We can not change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I've never tried to block out the memories of the past, even though some are painful. I don't understand people who hide from their past. Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now.

My past made me who I am today. And i'm very happy with who I have become. Would I change any of it ? No. Do I wish i could do something different? No. The mistakes and dreams of my past, are now the reality of my wonderful future I have ahead of me. Thank you to everyone who has been in and out of my life, shaping me into who I am. Without you, I would not be who I am today.


God Bless.

<3 Amanda

Stereotypes and the truth.

Stereotypes are one of the biggest parts of our society, especially American society that should not be a part of it. Stereotypes infuse hate very subtly into the minds of our children and lead to racist mindsets that separate different types of people. Stereotypes are used by us all whether we realize that we are using them or not.

I can say that almost, if not all of us have been affected by stereotypes. Me personally, i have overcome and lived through various stereotypes through out my life. I've been the cheerleader, the pageant girl, the fake 2 faced girl, the barbie doll, the gossiper, i've been through almost every spectrum of the stereotype rainbow.
So why do we stereotype? Why do people constantly need to feel like they need to categorize people, or label people? To this day, I still have no clear answer.

God created each and every one of us just the way he invisioned, the way he imagined, and in a sense, we are all perfect. Were the children of god,one big giant family somehow all connected in one way or another. I strongly believe that we are all beautiful in a way because god makes no mistakes. Stereotypes negative or positive, are a permanent part of our society, whether we want them to be or not.
Its in our natural subconscious to categorize and label people based on their appearance, clothes, hair, or just the way they look.

I used to be the girl that looked at someone and immediatley judged them, and subconsciously put them in a "group" or "stereotype." And what category they fell in determined if I would befriend them or not. TERRIBLE. I know. And I look back and realized how immature I was and how much I have grown since then.

Everyone deserves a chance. Just like the old seign says, "Dont judge a book by its cover." And I live by this quote every single day. I dont care how someone looks, how someone dresses, or how someone chooses to live. At the end of the day the only persons opinion that truly matters is the lord.

So next time you catch yourself "stereotyping" stop and think for a second. This person could be the one that becomes you next best friend, boyfriend/girlfriend or the one changes your life forever. Or the one whos life YOU change forever by fighting the stereotypes, and treating everyone like the lord wants us to. Equally.

Keep Fighting.

<3 Amanda

Inspiration and Motivation

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today.

I would hold you in my arms, I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done, forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do to hear your voice again
Sometimes I wanna call you but I know you won't be there

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide because it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this.



"Hurt" by Christine Aguilera had told the story of my life at one point. One point very recently. To this day I still listen to this song and think back to the old times where I once thought I had met "THE ONE." 2 and a half years I spent with this man, and to this day, I wouldnt have traded any of them for the world. They changed me as a person, I learned so many things from this, good and bad, and if it wasnt for him, I would not be the person I am today.
When he ended things with me, and I found out what he had all done behind my back, I thought my life was over. I didnt even know where to begin trying to pick things back up. I was broken, into millions of pieces, and I thought I was never getting up. I spent sleepless nights, crying, and asking God the same question: Why.
I didnt know why God wanted to see my suffer like this, and I would pray every night that God would give him back to me. It took me until just a few months to finally get my answer.
Just like the story, "People are sometimes put into your life for a reason, and sometimes for a season. Others are put there to last." With this man, he was put there for a reason, to help me understand how to love unconditionally, how to treat and respect another person, and how to ultimatley and genuinely care for another. It may have not been the picture perfect relationship. We had lots of bumpy roads and twists and turns, but all in all, I learned from this realtionship and grew. And changed.And today, I am a completley different person. Sronger, and Smarter. And if it wasnt for him, this change would not have happened.
I look back and realize what God did. And I thank him every chance I get, and I know that he has plans to prosper me, and not harm me. I walk by faith, not by sight.
I also wish that I could thank this man for everything, and apologize for all the hurt I caused him in our relationship. I was a terrible, mean person at one point. And I am not proud of half of my actions in that realationship, nor will I ever be. But I know we both learned from this, and grew into mature, adults.
I hope wherever he is, whatever he is doing, he is happy. and doing great. Because he completley deserves it. He is and always will be my first true love, and an amazing person. Always.

<3 Amanda